Friday, September 16, 2011

Microwave Conspiracy

I'm not generally a conspiracy theorist, but I have uncovered something big.  It's incredibly diabolical, yet it's subtle enough that it has gone under the radar for decades.  When I detail it for you, you'll imediately recognize what I'm talking about, and you'll likely wonder why you hadn't noticed it despite it being right in front of your nose the whole time.

We often take it for granted that microwaves have different power capabilities; a better quality microwave is expected to be more powerful than a cheaper one.  Heuristically, it makes sense, and it is a compelling tale.  However, when one peels the layers of this rotten onion away, one will discover a truly treacherous situation.  The lack of power uniformity has nothing to do with quality.  You read that correctly.  Tell me your world is not rocked!

The real reason that some microwaves are more powerful than others is so us commoners (defined as not being in the microwave business) make incredible messes when we try to make oatmeal.

I hope I didn't ruin your views on humanity...I'm just trying to keep it real here on the blog.


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