Monday, November 21, 2011

Get Rich Quick Scheme!

The other day, I was driving down a small town road in a 25 mph zone, and I saw something that inspired a get rich quick idea.  It's so elegant and simple that I'm ashamed I didn't devise it sooner.  Surely, you've driven through intersections where firefighters held up boots asking for change to fund the station.  Well, I witnessed something similar, yet subtly different.  As I was driving, I saw two people holding up buckets asking for change.  However, the buckets had no indication of what the cause they were raising funds for was, and they were wearing reflective vests, so even if they were wearing shirts of an organization, nobody would have known.  However, most cars stopped, rolled down their windows, and poured change into the containers.

The fact that people blindly donated to the mystery cause is the focal point of my idea.  Why can't I just stand in an intersection asking people for money?  Some may call this panhandling, but they are oversimplifying things to a degree with which I am uncomfortable.  There are many differences, so before you label me as a hobo, consider the following:

1.  No hobo I've ever seen has parking cones.
2.  No hobo I've ever seen has reflective vests.
3.  I would not even mildly consider spitting on a windshield and washing it off with newspaper.
4.  I would require that my employees shower daily.

To be fair, I will note one similarity, namely that the money raised would go to the purchase of beer.
If you still don't believe that this scheme is little more than begging, at least have the decency to refer to my idea as "White Collar Panhandling."  I also hope that if you refuse to acknowledge the difference between what I'm proposing and begging, you at least recognize that you're jealous that I thought of it first.


No comments:

Post a Comment