Dear Computer Virus Makers,
Just because you sit in your parents' basements using words like "pwned" while you're busy not getting any does not mean that it is either your duty or your right to be rat bastards. You contribute nothing to society other than adding traffic on our roads and excrement to our sewers. You are a boil on the festering pus wounds of the lowest of scumbags everywhere. In fact, if you were an ice cream flavour, you would be pralines and dick. Your existence is pathetic and meaningless, and nothing would make my day more than you getting hit in the balls by a marlin leaping form the water like a cannon. May you all die of gonorrhea and rot in the darkest bowels of Hell, and may Doritos powder find its way into your motherboards.
Sincerely,
FSG
P.S. I have it on good authority that your mothers tried to sell you for a pack of cigarettes while she was in prison for bringing your useless carcasses into this world.
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