Monday, January 3, 2011

Identity Crisis

For the last few weeks, I've been in a state of flux.  I've become a very different person, and I just wanted to share that now.  About a month ago, I noticed that there was some residual liquid on the floor of my beloved fortress, the middle stall.  I didn't think much of it, but then it happened again a few days later, and again, and again, and again.  Growing wary and somewhat disgusted by this water, I began to rethink everything.  There was no way to discount the possibility that said liquid was once housed in some aimless fool's bladder, and that thought lead me to branch out and try something new.

The other day, I sojourned in the first stall to conduct my business.  At first, it felt unnatural.  It almost seemed like a betrayal of nearly Benedict Arnold proportions.  Then, I realized all of the sudden (epiphany moment forthcoming) that the middle stall betrayed me first.

From now on, I am sold on the first stall.  It is cozy, functional, and most importantly, I don't have to swim in piddle to use it!  Accordingly, I'm henceforth changing my name to First Stall Guy.

Thank you for your understanding,


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